That is when we went on vacation. We had good time, but when I got back to work. Whoa… strap on the seat belt and hang on. April began with me leaving for San Antonio over the Easter weekend and Katie going to Vegas with a couple of her friends. She had a good time. I was working and it was extremely humid and raining in San Antonio. When Katie got back she complained about how crappy she felt when she was in Vegas… she took a pregnancy test and… we found out that we are going to be parents!

Well, so April and May blew by. I think I was busy at work. I can’t say that I really remember. June started with a short trip to visit Katie’s mom in Utah. During the trip we found out that my little sister, Anna, was hospitalized with shortness of breath and that an x-ray has indicated that there was a mass in her chest. Since Anna was in Italy she had to travel to Germany to have a CT scan and a biopsy to determine the true size of the mass and what it truly was. Anna went home (Italy) for a while and returned to Germany in the middle of July to start her chemo-therapy.

Meanwhile in Long Beach… At some point in May, Katie had thrown out her back. She had muddled through the end of May and made the trip to Utah, but when she got back she was in a bit of pain. She stayed home from work for a while on bed rest to let her back heal. She went back and forth to work, and ended up home on bed rest for Independence Day. I went back to work on the 5th of July, Katie ended up in the hospital. She had ruptured a disc in her lower back. After a few weeks in the hospital, Katie underwent surgery on July 26. The surgery was a success and Katie is recovering quickly.

Mom left for Germany on July 22 to take care of Anna. Mom is returning on Wednesday, Anna is arriving from Germany with Dorian and Wayne on Thursday. Dad is arriving from New Jersey on Thursday as well. Why is everyone convening in Southern California? My little brother, Ben, is getting married on Aug 26!

See, pretty crazy… and that is just the highlight reel…

That was the day that Katie and I found out that we lost our baby. Technically, they call it a miscarriage because the baby died before the 20th week. The whole adventure started when we went in for a routing ultrasound on Wednesday, December 27. The major trauma ended at noon on Friday when I brought Katie home from the hospital.

The problem is, you don’t recover from this type of loss quickly. Or as it turns our easily. Neither Katie nor I are crying at the drop of a pin. We’ve finished with that, but our emotions are still quick to rise. Right now, they surface as anger, fear and other feelings.

Today, Katie and I got into a little spat. I could feel the emotion well up inside of me, and I didn’t want it to come out directed in anger at Katie. We got through it okay, we manage to work through our problems. I just want to avoid lashing out at Katie while we continue to work through the emotions that we are feeling with our loss.

My first week back to work was tough. It was difficult to maintain focus and the few days I missed made a significant impact to my workload. That coupled with the fact that it was a short week really threw me. Katie’s birthday was on the 5th, and she shares the day with her Mom. We went to Disneyland on Saturday. Vanessa got us in to Club 33 and the eight of us (Katie and me, Mom, Ben and Vanessa, Ron and Ginger, and Carolyn). Lunch was awesome. The rest of the day was very fun and very tiring. Katie and I ended up sleeping most of Sunday.

The second week back was much easier – I managed to get caught up with most of my work. I won’t get into details, especially since I make it a policy to not write about work directly, but I worked a few fairly long days last week. The pace at work is unreal, and doesn’t show any hint of slowing done. Really, it works for me. I’m an addictive personality and work is an addiction… in reality I like the pace.

Anyways, back to the world becoming unglued… it definitely feels like it is coming unglued. Not exactly sure why I feel that way, but I think things will be clearer (maybe better) over time…

I’d like to send my love to all my family and friends. They are a constant blessing to Katie and me. I wish everyone the best, and thank them for all their love and support.

-Josh

Kate and I hosted the Thanksgiving dinner for my mom, Katie’s parents – Ron and Ginger, my brother Ben and his fiancé Vanessa, and Vanessa’s parents – Gerry and Bobbie. I made the turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy. Katie made pumpkin pies. Ginger, Katie’s mom, made a squash puff pastry and Bobbie & Gerry brought some great olives and cranberry relish.

This year, I felt that we all had a lot to be thankful for. I’ve been at my job for a year now – a quick and hectic year, but a rewarding one. Katie and I found out that we are going to be parents two weeks ago – something we thought to be a long shot considering Katie’s recent health problems. Vanessa is coming up on the end of her first year at the law firm that she works for. Katie’s sister Annie and her husband, Pat, are moving to Missouri next year for Pat’s new job (way to go Pat). Mom is working on getting her house fixed up.

I hope everyone can find as much a possible to be thankful for in the last year, I know it has been a special one for my family.

w00t! w00t! w00t!!!

Click the thumbnail below to see the ultrasound:
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